FANDOM DOCTOR GUIDE PART 1: DANGEROUS SYNDROMES

Welcome to the fandom doctor guide! In about 3 parts I am gonna try to illustrate all the syndromes/illnesses/diseases etc that threaten the welfare of our beloved fandoms and the most drastic treatments available.

1. Mark Syndrome
History: By far the most dangerous condition a TV-show writer can find him/herself into. This syndrome is named after “Mark Schwan”, One Tree Hill’s writer, who was the first one to show many symptoms of unexplained behavior during the writing of the show, leading to the creation of a brand new syndrome, as the same symptoms begun to appear to other writers as well, including the Gossip Girl’s ones.
Description/Symptoms: Inability to comprehend the fans needs that result in the formation of unacceptable, boring, “wtf” storylines and couples. The one that suffers from that syndrome cannot adjust to the audience’s new requests and sticks to the plan he/her had from the beginning without caring for the consequences this might have on the fan base of the show. Also he/her is highly insensitive to pleas for a different storyline/couple, even if 90 or more percent of the ones involved in the fandom insists. Some of the symptoms that don’t always appear are: excessive drama input, leading the most popular and beloved characters in deep shit and an unconditional love for all “Mary Sue”.
Treatment: The ones that have just begun to show the syndrome’s symptoms have a chance of salvation if the fandom’s fans put impossible pressure onto them. Cases that have the symptoms for more than a season unfortunately cannot be saved in any way.

2. Catherine-Effects Syndrome
History: This syndrome is the one responsible for terrible special effects on much anticipated movies. It is named after “Catherine Hardwiche”, best known as the director of Twilight, who managed to take the movie to another -shitness- level, by using what is now going down to the movies industry as “Catherine-Effects”.
Description/Symptoms: As the name suggests, this syndrome mostly affects the special effects of a movie which in most cases is the present’s year one the fans are going crazy for. Combined with non-existent budget, it results in the creation of special effects similar to the ones of the original King Kong movie and the use of Paris Hilton’s glitter lotion for the “dazzling” effect of what’s supposed to be “diamonds embedded in one’s skin”.
Treatment: If the movie stands alone, the only thing that can be done is a re-make of the effects for the DVD release and prayers that people will bother to buy it. If the movie is part of a trilogy, saga etc, the treatment can lead to drastic changes in the following movies. Supposing that the movie turned into a blockbuster despite the Catherine-Effects, the producer increases the budget for the ones to come, fires the director who suffers from the syndrome and orders the new one to actually use a computer in order to make the special effects and drop the whole lotion-thing.